Types
| Glamor | The glamor gaslighter uses periods of positivity to justify the negative actions that follow. They come off as very kind people, often times going above and beyond the normal role of husband or wife (Stern, 2007). They make their victims life glamourous and ideal for the most part. Although kind, they disappear for periods of time when upset, with no signal of doing so. When they accuse the victim of wrongdoing, the victim must agree that it was their fault. If not, the fight continues. This form of gaslighting becomes complicated because the victim oftentimes brushes off the incidents. There is enough positivity in the relationship that the periods of negativity don’t outweigh them. The victim essentially falls under the spell of love, disregarding all the instances of abuse as insignificant. |
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| Good Guy | The good guy gaslighter is always right. The victim never wins an argument, even if they were correct. In this type of relationship, the victim generally feels everything is going perfect. For the most part, the relationship is ideal. But when it comes to arguing, the abuser must be correct. If he or she does not get their way, then the arguing will persist. The arguing eventually drains the victim, and ends with a loss, every time. |
| Intimidator | The intimidator uses fighting to their advantage. They instill fear into their victims until they comply with their reasoning. The general rule that defines an intimidator is that they use punishment to control the situation (Stern, 2007). Punishments can be physical, mental, or both, and are used to maintain control. This is the easiest form of gaslighting to identify. |