Gaslighting is hard to stop because the abuser denies it is happening. The first step to ending a situation with gaslighting is to catch the abuser in the act of lying. This can be done with audio recordings, video recordings, or a 3rd party (Snow, 2016). This step is crucial because to solve a problem, one must be identified. This is the hardest step because many are uninformed of this phenomenon, so how would the victim know it’s happening?
The second step is to remain defiant and recognize that the abuser will not admit their wrongdoings (Ariel, 2017). It is important stand strong and refuse to fall into the abusers twisted reality. Staying strong takes away from the abuser’s power and makes the victim less of a target. The third step is to realize that there may be no solution and develop a healthy detachment (Ariel, 2017). It’s important to come to terms with this as some people refuse to change. It is unrealistic to expect a relationship to change 100%. Sometimes it is better to let things go despite the attachment.
Lastly it is important to seek help. A councilor may be able to work with the situation and correct many elements of it. A councilor has the ability to view the relationship objectively and act on those observations, creating a better reality for both the victim and the abuser. The only problem with this is that sometimes councilors can reinforce the issue. There have been instances of male councilors putting down women clients as being “dramatic” or similar. It is important to seek external help if this should occur (Gass, 1988).